Hello? Part Two

Why do we pray?

So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. - Genesis 1:27

What is the closest relationship you can think of? Maybe husband and wife, maybe best friends, maybe siblings might pop into your head, but the most pivotal relationship in most people’s lives is that between a parent and child. It’s the thing that changes you most, realigns your values, changes the way you look at things, and changes your life in such a monumental way that your life becomes two sections of ‘before kids’ and ‘after kids’. This relationship isn’t only one way. The bond between a baby and its parents, or the people raising it, is unmatched by any other relationship formed that is so clear, and such a joy to see for anyone who gets to witness this. The child is totally reliant on its caregiver, unable to offer anything of value, and yet the parent has a love for their child which is stronger than any other love felt before, an unconditional love which is happy simply just to be in the presence of the child, able to transform any mood into pure elation any time they are together. That bond, that closeness, that feeling of love is purely natural, the way we were designed to give and receive from our first parent, our heavenly Father, so where did those feelings go for so many people?

When humanity was first created, we were made as close to God as we could be. He made us like Himself, and He made us to be in relationship with Him. No other animal or creature is described as in His image, and He does not have the relationship with any other animal which He had with humans. He made us specially, uniquely different from the rest, able to talk to Him, communicate, ask Him questions, work with Him. At the beginning of Genesis, prayer wasn’t something Adam had to close his eyes or put his hands together for, it was an open conversation with his Master, undistracted by anything around him, unafraid to ask or say anything to He who he knew loved him most. Adam didn’t talk to God because he felt like he had to, he didn’t think of it as a chore he had to do, it was the most natural thing in the world and it didn’t stop just when he opened his eyes or at the word ‘amen’. If this is what prayer was designed to be, then when did it get so boring?

For many people, their image of prayer is one of sitting silently, as still as possible, waiting until it’s all over. Sadly, this image is learnt from experience for lots. Sitting in school assembly trying to keep still, dreading the moment on Sunday in church when you have to close your eyes for minutes on end, waiting for it all to finish, sometimes ending with the drudgery chant of the Lord’s prayer, feeling like you’re part of some weird cult, not really knowing what half of it actually means, or sat at home, feeling like you’re ready to start making an effort with this whole spirituality thing, putting your hands together and closing your eyes, just for your mind to wander off after about 30 seconds, or when you feel a notification go off on your phone, turning the task into a boring chore you’re happy to see the end of. I don’t blame you at all - for a long time it’s how I saw prayer, and it’s how I think some (definitely not all) people higher up in some church circles like to portray it so they can make themselves feel better than others when they do the longest prayers they can with the biggest and most theological words. Unfortunately for them, you can’t score points with God. Many people have a subconscious scoreboard in their mind when coming to church - it lasted 10 minutes extra today that’ll boost me up, it was more boring than usual today so that’s 20 extra points, prayers went on for even longer, jackpot! Church isn’t a speed awareness course, it’s not made just to be attended and forgotten about, it’s there as a place to meet God, and if that isn’t the case for you right now, either you’re doing it wrong, or you’re at the wrong church.

“When you pray, don’t be like the hypocrites who love to pray publicly on street corners and in the synagogues where everyone can see them. I tell you the truth, that is all the reward they will ever get. But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private. Then your Father who sees everything, will reward you. When you pray, don’t babble on and on as the Gentiles do. They think their prayers are answered merely by repeating their words again and again. Don’t be like them, for your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him!” - Matthew 6:5-8

Prayer isn’t a performance, it’s a deeply personal and intimate action. It’s where you can be the most honest, true, raw version of yourself without any worry of being judged unfairly or cast aside. When Jesus says ‘hypocrites’, He’s calling them actors, people who are fake, playing a part, there’s no room for that when you’re talking to God. If you give Him only surface level effort, you’ll never get anything more than a surface level relationship. Jesus firstly mentions praying in synagogues, talking about Jews who pray piously and falsely, but then He talks about gentiles, saying they babble on and on, meaning they are praying to their gods, who they believe appreciate all the extra nonsense they say, all the stuff they repeat, all the grovelling, because in their world, the gods don’t love them, they don’t even like them, they have to beg just to get their favour, and even then it’s not a secure thing. To compare Jews to the gentiles and pagans would have been insulting at best, but Jesus is trying to open their eyes to what their prayer has become, He’s saying ‘we’re not like them! Our God is real and He loves you and yet you still act like you prefer human praise over all the blessings He can give you!’. The things God can give you and bless you with through a proper relationship with Him far outweigh anything the world or other people could even hope to give you. Their praise will seem pointless, the worldly rewards will seem completely futile. The hypocrites wanted to be seen as better than others by their peers, the gentiles were begging for physical worldly rewards from their gods, Jesus is asking the question, what’s your goal?

Prayer was a given. Jesus didn’t use the word ‘if’, He said ‘when you pray’. To Him, believing in God and praying went hand in hand, to not do it would be farcical, like saying you’re a runner but never going on a run, or saying you’re a cinephile having never watched a film. To call yourself a Christian is to have a relationship with God, and to have a relationship with God is to pray. To pray is to have faith, to pray is to trust that there’s a being out there so powerful He can create a world with just His words, and yet so loving that He chooses to listen to you. To pray is to jump into His arms and give Him all that’s on your mind, even the things you can’t give to anyone else, and to believe that He cares enough about you that He’ll hear you and answer, and to pray is to trust that the answer probably won’t be what you expect, maybe not even what you like, or it might not even come. Our trust is what opens our hearts to Him. Trust, even when your prayer time still feels lonely, even when you feel like He can’t hear you, when it feels like He’s letting everything fall apart around you and doing nothing to help. It’s through those times, through persistent prayer, that our faith is able to grow and mature, that we are able to have our hearts purified, and able to love Him in new ways.

Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. - 1 John 3:18

It’s so easy to give up hope. Things go wrong, you feel like rubbish, you turn to God in prayer, and you feel…absolutely nothing. This is the easiest time to decide that there’s no point in this prayer thing and only remember that time over all the other times He’s helped you. I know, I’ve been there. But that’s not real faith. Yes, you made the right choice in choosing to pray, but how can you truly say you trust if you just give up the first time you don’t hear anything back? I know how scary it can be in situations like that, like you have a rock to cling to, and all of a sudden, it’s not there, but if you believe in the same God as me, you’ll know He’s there, whether you can hear Him or not. You’re placing your earthly expectations on the Holiest of beings. His love is perfect, and He loves you, He wants the best for you, so if you’re going through a season of God being quiet, it’s probably for a reason. It’s not because He doesn’t love you as much as others, it’s not because you’re being too much, it’s to perfect your faith. If we pray to have a relationship with Him, that includes trust, and there’s no one better to put your trust in.

There can be many things to pray for, the most important thing is remembering who you’re praying to. In Matthew 26 and Mark 14, when the woman used expensive perfume on Jesus and the disciples tried to rebuke her in saying that the money from selling the perfume could’ve gone to the poor, He reminds them that they will always have the poor, but what the woman was doing, honouring the Messiah, was more important. When we’re going through tough periods in life, of course it is right to pray for God to deliver you from the situation, but what’s more important than that is to keep on worshipping and glorifying Him even when it is hard. There will always be the poor, just like there will always be the next bill you have to pay, the next tough conversation you’ve got to have, the next friend lost, job lost, family lost, the list goes on, but don’t forget to still praise Him. In a close relationship, the other person will always be there to listen to what’s on your heart, but if that becomes all that the relationship is, something is lost.

“It is not the strength of your faith, but the object of your faith that saves you.” - Timothy Keller

You don’t pray because you have everything figured out or because you feel like you have to. You pray because the God of the bible is a loving God, a God who came to die just for you, and a God who wants a deeply personal relationship with you. If no one else had ever existed and you were the only person on earth, Jesus still would’ve suffered and died for you. That’s how much He loves you. You don’t pray to impress Him, you pray to be with Him. You are His child, His beloved child, all He wants is for you to return to Him.

How one sided is your relationship with God at the moment?

I hope this has raised some big questions in your heart. One thing after thinking about why we pray, is figuring out what in the world do I pray?

Stay tuned…